Virtual Console Roundup

Crack Down

• Platform: Megadrive
• Wii Points: 800
• In Real Money: £5.60 (8 Euros)

"Impressive ascent, agent!" No, no that one. While the muffled speech at the start apparently identifies it as "Quackduff", this Crack Down (note the space twixt the words) is a top-down action game, a sort of stealth cyberpunk Gauntlet with some curious design quirks.

Notably, the action is compressed into a tiny window in the corner of the screen, while an equal amount of space is given over to a box listing the enemies you'll be fighting. Plastered across the top of the screen are boxes containing a map, plus scores and ammo counts.

So you scurry around the little maze environments, finding bombs to deactivate. Enemies approach when they see you, and can either be punched or shot. Either method proves hit or miss, as this is one of those games where you can stand right next to an enemy, and still miss because your attacks go one pixel over their head. You can press yourself against the wall to avoid bullets while smart bombs clear the screen. The bad guys constantly respawn at a ludicrous rate though, and as the whole thing is played against the clock there's a limit to how much time you can waste running around trying not to die.

There's the kernel of a good idea in here, and the focus on sneaking probably seemed fairly clever and groundbreaking at the time (assuming you hadn't played the Metal Gear games) but today it feels too clunky and fiddly and the meagre gameplay amusement on offer isn't enough to compensate. As always, the option for two player co-op offers some giggles, but its still way overpriced for what it is.

6/10

Shining in the Darkness

• Platform: Megadrive
• Wii Points: 800
• In Real Money: £5.60 (8 Euros)

This week's RPG platter comes in the shape of this charming but basic dungeon crawler, which created the long-running Shining series but is otherwise forgettable.

There's a magic kingdom, missing princess, bearded shopkeepers selling bronze daggers - everything you expect. The first-person pseudo-3D exploration makes it look more interesting than it actually is, while the turn-based combat is rudimentary. It's not a bad game, exactly, just probably only of interest to JRPG fanatics.

Outside of historical curiosity there's no real reason to spend 800 points on this. Double Dungeons, the TurboGrafx oddity, is already available for less money - if you absolutely must have a basic dungeon game, I'd go for that one. It looks even more prehistoric, but has bags more charm.

5/10

ESWAT Cyber Police: City Under Siege

• Platform: Megadrive
• Wii Points: 800
• In Real Money: £5.60 (8 Euros)

That's a whole lot of title for a pretty uninspired game, a port in name only of the 1989 arcade cabinet, itself in no way inspired by Robocop. No, sir.

Much like Rolling Thunder, Green Beret and oodles more scrolling shooty-platform games, you roam left, right, up and down dispensing bullets at right angles as you battle to save the city from Naughty People. As you progress you start to collect elements of the cyber-armour which so tantalisingly graces the menu screen, but there's rather too much plodding action to be trudged through before you get to play with that, admittedly fun, toy.

In its defence, ESWAT is smooth and playable in that bland sort of way that generic 80s games often are. It's also quite easy, with five hits before you die and enemies that blindly shoot at nothing in the hope that you'll stray into their path. Undemanding retro fans will probably find enough to amuse them (though whether its 800 points worth of amusement is debatable) but you're not missing much if you don't download it.

5/10